Happy Chinese New Year!

Happy new year to all you Chinese (and other Asian) bastards! This is the year of the OX. You know it's going to be a good year when the letters of this year's animal are the same letters you use when playing Tic Tac Toe. I wonder if the economy is going to affect the number of red envelopes (filled with money) that kids are going to receive this year.

So last night consisted of a traditional paying respects ceremony at the Gee How Oak Tin Association headquarters, followed by the Chinese New Year's Eve annual banquet. Typically this event consists of all vegetarian food, but this year they decided to celebrate the year of the Ox by clogging my arteries. Good, because I'm a meat-a-tarian. It's a personal choice.

Anyway, so with the food there was also a large quantity of red wine that was consumed. I think my Dad had too much to drink because he ended up "accidentally" knocking over a tea cup, spilling tea on my Mom's dress. I thought it was pretty funny. What I didn't find funny was the fact that I got CUT OFF from drinking wine near the end of the night. I wasn't even drunk, but I guess it looked like it when I chugged an entire glass of wine after we did one of the many New Years cheers. It should be a rule that you cannot be cut off unless you either puke, molest someone, or are clinically dead on the floor.

Here is some interesting information courtesy of wikipedia...

In Chinese astrology the zodiac of twelve animal signs represents twelve different types of personality. The zodiac traditionally begins with the sign of the Rat, and there are many stories about the Origins of the Chinese Zodiac which explain why this is so (see below). The following are the twelve zodiac signs in order and their characteristics.

1. Rat (Yang, 1st Trine, Fixed Element Water): Forthright, disciplined, systematic, meticulous, charismatic, hardworking, industrious, charming, eloquent, sociable, shrewd. Can be manipulative, vindictive, mendacious, venal, selfish, obstinate, critical, over-ambitious, ruthless, intolerant, scheming.
2. Ox (Yin, 2nd Trine, Fixed Element Water): Dependable, calm, methodical, patient, hardworking, ambitious, conventional, steady, modest, logical, resolute, tenacious. Can be stubborn, narrow-minded, materialistic, rigid, demanding.
3. Tiger (Yang, 3rd Trine, Fixed Element Wood): Unpredictable, rebellious, colorful, powerful, passionate, daring, impulsive, vigorous, stimulating, sincere, affectionate, humanitarian, generous. Can be restless, reckless, impatient, quick-tempered, obstinate, selfish.
4. Rabbit (Yin, 4th Trine, Fixed Element Wood): Gracious, kind, sensitive, soft-spoken, amiable, elegant, reserved, cautious, artistic, thorough, tender, self-assured, astute, compassionate, flexible. Can be moody, detached, superficial, self-indulgent, opportunistic, lazy, horny.
5. Dragon (Yang, 1st Trine, Fixed Element Wood): Magnanimous, stately, vigorous, strong, self-assured, proud, noble, direct, dignified, zealous, fiery, passionate, decisive, pioneering, ambitious, generous, loyal. Can be arrogant, imperious, tyrannical, demanding, eccentric, grandiloquent and extremely bombastic, prejudiced, dogmatic, over-bearing, violent, impetuous, brash.
6. Snake (Yin, 2nd Trine, Fixed Element Fire): Deep thinker, wise, mystic, graceful, soft-spoken, sensual, creative, prudent, shrewd, ambitious, elegant, cautious, responsible, calm, strong, constant, purposeful. Can be loner, bad communicator, possessive, hedonistic, self-doubting, distrustful, mendacious.
7. Horse (Yang, 3rd Trine, Fixed Element Fire): Cheerful, popular, quick-witted, changeable, earthy, perceptive, talkative, agile mentally and physically, magnetic, intelligent, astute, flexible, open-minded. Can be fickle, arrogant, anxious, rude, gullible, stubborn.
8. Ram (Yin, 4th Trine, Fixed Element Fire): Righteous, sincere, sympathetic, mild-mannered, shy, artistic, creative, gentle, compassionate, understanding, mothering, determined, peaceful, generous, seeks security. Can be moody, indecisive, over-passive, worrier, pessimistic, over-sensitive, complainer, wise.
9. Monkey (Yang, 1st Trine, Fixed Element Metal): Inventor, motivator, improviser, quick-witted, inquisitive, flexible, innovative, problem solver, self-assured, sociable, polite, dignified, competitive, objective, factual, intellectual. Can be egotistical, vain, selfish, reckless, snobbish, deceptive, manipulative, cunning, jealous, suspicious.
10. Rooster (Yin, 2nd Trine, Fixed Element Metal): Acute, neat, meticulous, organized, self-assured, decisive, conservative, critical, perfectionist, alert, zealous, practical, scientific, responsible. Can be over zealous and critical, puritanical, egotistical, abrasive, opinionated.
11. Dog (Yang, 3rd Trine, Fixed Element Metal): Honest, intelligent, straightforward, loyal, sense of justice and fair play, attractive, amicable, unpretentious, sociable, open-minded, idealistic, moralistic, practical, affectionate, dogged. Can be cynical, lazy, cold, judgmental, pessimistic, worrier, stubborn, quarrelsome.
12. Pig (Yin, 4th Trine, Fixed Element Water): Honest, simple, gallant, sturdy, sociable, peace-loving, patient, loyal, hard-working, trusting, sincere, calm, understanding, thoughtful, scrupulous, passionate, intelligent. Can be naive, over-reliant, self-indulgent, gullible, fatalistic, materialistic.

For the record, I was born the year of the Dog. Look at that description, it's definitely me, especially the characteristic that says "lazy".

By the way, if you're looking to collect red envelopes and you can barely speak Chinese, make sure you remember these two phrases:

1. gung hay fat choy: best wishes for a prosperous and good year
2. sun tai geen hong: wishing you good health

In other news, it's Big Frank Cho's birthday today:

This picture is ridiculous.

Welcome to Club 26. It blows.

Sports

• The Celtics walloped the Mavs yesterday. Eddie "Don't Leave the!" House was on fiyahhhhhh, hitting seven 3-pointers and scoring something like 23 points. Rajon Rondo had another solid performance scoring 13 points, grabbing 7 boards, swindling 4 steals and handing out 14 dime pieces. This team is again showing signs of domination, just like how Big Frank Cho is dominating that little girl in the picture above, and I like it.

• Looks like the Red Sox have made a formal offer to re-sign Jason Varitek. Looks like it could be a two-year deal, not sure on the dollar figure just yet. It's safe to say that it's not going to be anywhere near the $10 million he made last year. Hey, we need this guy, not only to keep our pitching staff in check, but to transfer some knowledge to the younger catchers before he retires. Listen, everyone is aware that Varitek is essentially an auto-out on offense, but his intangibles (calling the game, clubhouse leadership, banging Heidi Watney) are what make him integral to the team. We have no real depth at the catching position, so I'm all for this signing if it happens.
  
  
• In case you were wondering why there were no locks of the day posted in awhile, it's because Big Q went on a ski trip for the last 4 days. Well, Big Q is back from his ski trip and he looked like death last night so we'll see if he can generate enough energy in the coming days to provide you all with some locks of the day.