Shit Poll, Weekend Recap and Other Thoughts...

There's only 4 more days left to vote on how many times per day you crap (see poll on the right). For the record, I am one of the people who clicked on "I am disgusting". Just thought you'd like to know that. On to the weekend recap...

I went to this restaurant/lounge/bar place called 28 Degrees on Friday. Apparently, they have $1 oysters from 5-7PM everyday. It's still a little pricey, but compared to the regular price ($2.75 per fuckin oyster!!!), it's a steal. I ate 18 oysters. They come out on trays filled with ice to keep 'em nice and cool, and provide you with cocktail sauce and 2 other sauces. Plus Tabasco sauce if you want. It was very classy the way they handled it. I wasn't very classy in the way I consumed it. The oysters were very good. I would definitely go back there again. Who wants to go? In case you were wondering, no I did not deuce in the bathroom there. I could've eaten 50 oysters no problem. If I did, then yes I would have deuced in the bathroom there.

Saturday, watched college football in my underwear at home, then went to eat Pho (vietnamese noodle soup) with Steve-O, then went to Cat/Jerry's for our softball team's end of the season get together where it was good food and good times as usual. I will not disclose our plans for the Typhoon 2009 season, but we do have something up our sleeves. By the way, I did not eat Pho or go to Cat/Jerry's in just my underwear. That was only done at home. I feel like I need to clarify this before someone thinks I'm disgusting. Well, if you don't think I'm disgusting, read the post below this and I'm sure you will... Ended the night at Gypsy Bar for Emilie's birthday. Big shout out to Emilie. HAPPY BDAY!

On Sunday, I had to wake up ridiculously early for flag football. Whoever decided to schedule a doubleheader starting at 8am should be shot, or at least violated in some way. Well, I take that back. We won both games, which kept us in the playoff hunt. Plus, G-Money got under Commish's skin and we almost duked it out. So I guess it wasn't a bad day after all. I love the intensity. Look at this ferocious D (This is a pic from last week's game. This week's photos haven't been posted):



Yeah, I'm the guy with the white cap chasing after the QB. And yes, I probably have the smallest penis on the field. Thank you.

I'd like to move on now to my "topic of the day/week/month/year/decade/century". If I post another entry tomorrow, then this becomes topic of the day. If I only post another entry next week, then it becomes topic of the week, and so on and so forth. You never know, I might not post another entry for another century. Like Kevin Garnett said: ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!!! Onto the topic...

The Napoleon Complex (also known as short man syndrome)

I'd like to give you some background as to what this is:

According to Wikipedia, Napoleon complex is a colloquial term describing an alleged type of inferiority complex which is said to affect some people who are physically short. The Napoleon complex is named after French Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte. The conventional wisdom is that Napoleon overcompensated for his short height by seeking power, war and conquest.

According to UrbanDictionary, Napoleon complex is a personality complex that consists of power trips and false machismo to make up for short height and feelings of inferiority.

There are reports that try to debunk this theory that short men are more aggressive than their taller counterparts saying that, in fact, taller people are more aggresive . I believe this is false.

Reason being: I HAVE THE NAPOLEON COMPLEX.

I've always wondered why I have such an explosive temper sometimes. I thought it was because I wasn't loved enough, or wasn't paid attention to enough, or wasn't treated right because I was an Asian boy growing up in an all white town. But now I've found the reason. It's because I'm short!

For example, when I play basketball, I don't bother boxing out for a rebound. I just push people who are bigger than me out of the way so I can get the ball. In football, I talk smack to the receiver and the quarterback after I break up or intercept a pass just to let them know not to pick on me. I might be short, but I am not to be fucked with. Those suckers we played yesterday learned that lesson (see, there goes my Napoleon complex!).

I like to feel like I'm in control of a situation, and when I'm not, I lash out so I don't feel inferior or weak. I guess it can be compared to kicking someone's ass the first day you arrive in prison. You need to let people know that you ain't fuckin around, because if you don't, you are gonna get a big black cock in your ass. I don't want a big black cock in my ass.

I make very rash decisions and act without thinking. But hey, at least I didn't make dumb decisions like these people:

Napoleon Bonaparte (between 5'2" and 5'6") - French emperor - attempted to invade and take over all of Europe
Joseph Stalin (5'4") - Dictator of the Soviet Union - launched the Great Purge
Josef Goebbels (5"5") - Hitler's Minister of Propaganda and Public Enlightenment - a mastermind of the Holocaust

So I guess what I'm saying is: if I'm not killing people or breaking the law, I think we all can live with me having the Napoleon complex. Everyone needs a little psycho in them (Those guys I mentioned above are not a little psycho. They are a LOT psycho). It makes life interesting. I don't know if what I typed even makes sense, but I'm glad I was able to dump it all into a post.

Haha he said "dump"...