Do we have to wear these jerseys the day Jerry X gets married?

One of the guys on my softball team is getting married on Sunday. It just so happens that we also have a softball game on Sunday, right before the dinner reception. My question is this. Should we play and show up to the reception wearing this? See below.

Personally, I think it would be awesome. Here's the story behind the uniforms.

Have a nice weekend you punk muthafuckasssssss!

Breaking news! Manny and Ortiz did roids in 2003

According to the New York Times, it appears that both Manny and Big Papi tested positive for PEDs in 2003. I probably shouldn't have titled this entry as "Breaking news" since no one is going to be surprised by this. At this point, it doesn't even faze me anymore. You could say that Jim Rice was taking roids in 1978 and I'd probably believe it. And if you're a Yankees fan, there's no point in laughing because everybody knows that there are Yankees on that list as well.

I don't get why they don't just release all of the names on that list now. I mean, what's the point of only releasing a name or two every few months? It prolongs the issue and makes baseball look even stupider.

Linda & Sean's wedding weekend recap

Greg couldn't make it, so I edited him into the picture.

I attended my cousin Linda's wedding over the weekend. It wasn't as completely ridiculous as Jim & Teresa's wedding weekend, but there were a lot of fun moments. Here is what transpired...

Friday Night

I headed over to the church at 6:30pm for the wedding rehearsal because apparently I was in charge of doing the First Reading at the wedding ceremony. Let me make one thing clear. Out of all of the people in this entire world, at what point does someone think "hey, let's ask Andrew to do a reading at our wedding?" Well, it looks like we answered that question.

Anyway, we did a quick practice run of the readings, peoples' positions throughout the ceremony, and so on so forth, then got the heck outta there around 8pm. We all headed over to Linda & Sean's (the groom) place in West Roxbury for a post rehearsal dinner. They have a really nice place, 2 bed, 2 bath, washer/dryer in house and a nice 40 inch LCD TV with NO cable. Everything is great about the place except the lack of cable. Seriously, who doesn't have cable nowadays? That's like owning a cell phone that doesn't have text messaging. Regardless of whether or not you use it, you should have it.

So we chowed down on a bunch of food, had some drinks and met and caught up with family and friends. I called it an early night shortly after 11pm because I am the king of laziness lately (in case you didn't know). Or you can just call me a pussy, same thing.

Saturday morning/afternoon

I woke up really early (around 7am) and got my ass to the Watertown Boston Sports Club (BSC). I've been on a huge health kick lately so I've been eating right, working out regularly and getting as much sleep as possible. I ran 2 miles, did a full body workout, then headed over to get a haircut at this place in Waltham called Just Cutz. If you don't know me, I have really short hair. I like to get fades. Just Cutz is perfect for fades. Why is that you ask? Because there are black guys cutting my hair. Just how Asians are born with the ability to excel in math and science, black people are born to excel in sports and producing tight fades. It's just a way of life.


So after my haircut, I headed home, showered, got dressed and headed over to the church to help setup for the wedding. The good thing about where I live is that it's a 2 minute walk to the church (I didn't have to worry about being late). The bad thing about where I live is that it's a 2 minute walk to the church (people keep asking me why I don't go to church regularly). I met with the wedding photographer and showed her around for a little while so she could "strategize". I also wanted to make sure I was in good with her so she wouldn't take any ridiculous pictures of me at the wedding reception (that remains to be seen).

About 45 minutes before the wedding was supposed to begin, someone realized that the parking lot attendant hadn't shown up so none of the cars could get into the parking lot. This obviously posed a problem because it's almost impossible to find a parking spot in Chinatown, especially on a Saturday afternoon (our church has an arrangement with the parking lot to provide free parking for church related events). So there was literally a line of cars all jammed down one street waiting for an attendant to show up. Finally, about 20 minutes before the wedding, the guy showed up, but this was after we broke down the chain linked barrier and moved all the cars into the lot to begin with. Fortunately, the guy didn't care. We put it back anyway.

These were all of the cars trying to park. Just kidding.

As far as the wedding ceremony is concerned, it went off without a hitch. The wedding procession went smooth, all of the readings went smooth (even mine), and the whole thing was done in about 30 minutes or so. No faintings at this wedding. I'm not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing.

Groomsmen, minus the Best Man and Godfather (Phil Chan)

After the wedding, everyone went downstairs to the lower church reception area for refreshments. There were egg rolls, shrimp cocktail, pastries, etc. A bunch of us sat around eating and talking and then we headed back to my place to relax before the dinner reception at 6pm. I got home and took a shower because I had swamp-ass (swamp-everything really) while everyone else watched TV and pregamed a little bit.

Linda and her lovely bridesmaids

Saturday evening

We arrived at the Back Bay Hilton shortly before 6pm and headed up to the cocktail hour right at 6pm. Typically, Asians aren't that punctual but when it's open bar all bets are off. I proceeded to consume a ridiculous amount of hors d'oeuvres (OR-DERVES) and alcohol until the actual dinner ceremony began a little after 7pm. The wedding party was introduced and came out to Drake's "Best I Ever Had" which is funny and creepy all at the same time since the song is about the best chick he's ever fucked. I'm not sure if my cousin Linda picked that song or if Sean did but, either way, I was trying not to think about it, HA.



Dinner was good. I had prime rib and a shitload of wine and hard liquor. Unlike our friend Doody from the previous wedding debacle, I successfully managed to cut my food and eat it as well! By the time the dance music started, I was pretty shitfaced so the rest of the story may have to be told by other attendees because I don't really remember shit. Apparently I blacked out shortly after chugging an entire glass of hennessy, puked on the parking lot ramp as we were leaving, and had to get carried up to my room and thrown into bed by my cousin Danny.

A drunk family is a friendly family.

As told by my roommate's girlfriend: "I came over shortly after you got home and noticed that you were passed out with half of your body on the bed and the other half dragging on the floor. I came into your room, asked if you needed help and tried to help you get your whole body into bed. You then told me to 'get the hell away' and told me to leave the room."

As told by my roommate himself: "I came into your room later and realized that you were struggling to get your shirt off. Apparently you didn't realize that you had to unbutton the sleeves to get your shirt off your arms so you were flipping out trying to get your shirt off. I had to calm you down and unbutton your shirt for you."


Naturally, I don't remember any of this happening. It happens...

However, I do remember waking up at like 7am and hearing some girl crying on the other side of the wall. I don't know if she just got punished or if something bad happened, but she was crying uncontrollably for what seemed like forever. Me, being the ever so patient gentleman that I am, then decided to bang on the wall and scream "SHUT THE FUCK UP! I'M TRYING TO FUCKIN SLEEP! NO ONE GIVES A SHIT. STOP CRYING!" Somehow, this strategy actually worked as she either killed herself or stopped crying or left the room.

The rest of the day consisted of me going to cheer on my softball team, then sitting out by my teammate Danny's pool all day, swimming and grilling food. I wasn't even hungover!

Memorable moments as mentioned by other people since I obviously don't remember most of them:

• My cousin Phil getting cut off from the bar after chugging a jack & coke right in front of the bartender, to which she replied with something like "no more for you. i have a responsibility to make sure you don't drink too much". No she doesn't. She has a responsibility to serve us our alcohol. She also has a responsibility to shut the F up. Phil was then permitted to resume drinking about an hour later. She was probably right because I am being told that Phil was passing out at the table shortly thereafter. Wait a minute, here's a picture of that.

• My cousin Kim BYOB'd her own bottle of Jack Daniels which somehow was confiscated by one of the employees since it was a cash bar at the time. That's funny, but not really. I mean, they only paid thousands of dollars to hold the event there, the least you can do is not get your panties in a bunch over a 30 dollar bottle of alcohol. What a bitch. We spent like a half an hour trying to find the bottle. It was like an easter egg hunt. Unfortunately we couldn't find it and reports indicate that it was returned at the end of the night.

• I am horrible at dancing. Please see the following video of everyone busting into Thriller. Well, everyone but me. You need to be logged into facebook to view it I believe.

• Following this, as relayed by my cousin Kim...
  
  Kim: after thriller, another MJ song came on and that groomsman was leading a dance so you go up and talk to him for a sec, and you start going in front of him to the right, and start dancing some dance so everyone on the dance floor is following the groomsman, and you're just dancing in your own world hahah
  

• This is a picture of me and my Dad dancing. This is either the YMCA or we are both gay. I'm leaning towards the "we are both gay" answer.

All other memorable moments will be added as I obtain information from other wedding attendees. Thank you.

By the way, I'm leaving tonight for Baltimore for the Sox/O's series and I have ANOTHER wedding on Sunday night so I should be back with some fire early next week. There's a chance I might be able to post something tomorrow but not sure what my internet access is gonna look like. In any event, stay tuned...

Breaking news! Tanning beds cause cancer!

In the most recent "no shit, we already knew that" study, it appears that cancer experts have now discovered that tanning beds increase your risk of cancer by 75 percent if you start using them regularly before the age of 30.

The new classification means tanning beds and other sources of ultraviolet radiation are definite causes of cancer, alongside tobacco, the hepatitis B virus and chimney sweeping, among others.

Also...

Previous studies found younger people who regularly use tanning beds are eight times more likely to get melanoma than people who have never used them. In the past, World Health Organization (WHO) warned people younger than 18 to stay away from tanning beds.

Source: MSN.com

Uhhh, did they really need to do this study? I thought everybody knew this already? Going to a tanning salon is like putting your body into an oven and cooking it. Seriously, they spend millions and millions of dollars on stupid ass studies that we already know the answer to or people don't care about. For example, they've been doing studies on which is worse, butter or margarine, for like the last 20 years. Who the hell cares?

They need to spend this research money on something more beneficial, like developing legitimate penis enlargement pills or something...

Amazing hole in one?

Everyone is calling this an amazing hole in one. See video below:



To be honest, I don't see what's so amazing about it. It's more luck than anything. His ball HIT OFF ANOTHER BALL and then went in. I mean yeah, a hole in one is great, but there wasn't anything AMAZING about this. That would be like calling this an AMAZING homerun, see video below:



To be fair, I'd probably flip out if I hit a hole a one this way, but I'm also a horrible golfer and I get pumped anytime I hit anything on or near the green.

Today, I am the greatest of all time

Congratulations to Rickey Henderson and our beloved Jim Rice for being the newest members of the baseball Hall of Fame (HOF). As most of you know, Rickey Henderson holds the record for most stolen bases ever and was one of the greatest lead off hitters ever to play the game. But what was even more special about Rickey Henderson was what came out of his mouth. I aptly named the title of this blog entry after one of his famous quotes.



Jim Rice played his entire career with the Red Sox, was an 8 time all star, MVP of the league in 1978 (6 times he was in the top 5 in MVP voting), and was second in rookie of the year voting (to Boston's own Fred Lynn who actually won the rookie of the year and MVP award that year) in 1975. A lot of people say that his poor relationship with the media is the reason why it took so long for him to be voted into the HOF. That may be true, but his numbers are borderline for entry. Regardless, it's time to celebrate a great accomplishment.

FYI, tune into the Red Sox game tomorrow night as they are retiring Jim Rice's number (14) during a pre game ceremony.

By the way, sometime this week there will be a recap of my cousin Linda's wedding on Saturday. It was a debacle as usual, so I need some time to sort through pics, videos, and interview people for their take on what happened. I blacked out, HA.

Is this the best wedding entrance ever?

Alright, my cousin Linda is getting married tomorrow and I happened to stumble across this video which is definitely fitting considering the circumstances. For the record, I set this post to occur before barstool had it on their site, so don't say I stole it from barstoolsports. We both stole it from SI Hot Clicks anyway...



I honestly don't think it's possible to have a better wedding entrance.

Speaking of marriage, it appears that Florida Gators star quarterback Tim Tebow is waiting for marriage to get it on because HE IS A VIRGIN. Not really that shocking, but sorta at the same time. I mean, seriously, how could he not have fucked any of the thousands of hot Florida chicks that have thrown themselves at him? He's either gay or actually a religious freak. All signs seem to indicate the latter.

Hopefully I will be back with some stories and some pictures next week. Till then, have a nice weekend you F..., M.. F..., C... S...s!

Yo quiero Taco Bell

Today is a sad, sad day. Our beloved chihuahua, Gidget, has died at the age of 15.


I am immediately going to drown my sorrows with a 2 chalupa meal, followed by a rush to the bathroom to shit my brains out. Here's to you, Gidget, may you rest in peace...

LeBron video to be released on TMZ website

According to TMZ, they will be releasing the highly anticipated video of LeBron James getting dunked on by some sophomore college player at 6:45PM today. This better be fuckin good. I mean, if he confiscated the tapes and it wasn't even that big of a facial, then LeBron is the biggest pussy ever.

Here is the link to the page.

By the way, if TMZ is doing this as a publicity stunt to generate traffic and they don't actually have the video, then that would be weaker than Simona Halep's bra...

Any reason to post this picture is good reason.

Update - From Deadspin.com comes this quote: And, according to one individual who saw the video, once it airs tonight and begins making its way around the web, smudged with the ugly TMZ watermark, it's going to, in this person's words, "make LeBron look even more of a bitch." Not because he gets posterized, but because how Lebron was actually "dunked on" was so surprisingly lame. All the tape shows is that LeBron was somewhat lazy about filling the lane before Xavier's Jordan Crawford authoritatively threw it down. That's it. And yet LeBron felt the need to sic his shoe company on the cameramen anyway.

Wow, if this is true he is the biggest cry baby in the entire world. What's even worse is the fact that I have a LeBron James shadow jersey (all black) that I have yet to wear and probably never will now. Thanks LeBron, you bitch.

Drunk People Yoga Positions

I got this material from my friend Pooty T who found it on this site called Fun Tuna. Please check it out, there's some really interesting stuff on there.











I have been in the savasana and salambhasana poses before and I'm sure everyone else has as well. Anyone been in any of the other poses?

Yesterday was not very fun

Wow, yesterday sucked. Not only did work drag on all day, but I managed to break my finger playing softball and was stuck in traffic on 93 north at 12:30AM because some fucking truck driver tried to go through the tunnel even though his truck exceeded the height limit, causing it to get stuck.

The Governator has spoken.

So I went to the doctor's office this morning, got the x-rays done which confirmed the broken finger, and now I'm on the DL for 6-8 weeks. This is fun.

In other news, it looks like Ben Roethlisberger was just accused of sexual assault. According to the report, it looks like the accuser filed a "civil" lawsuit against him and 8 other guys. I sense shenanigans here. Obviously this is a ploy to get money from him because if you really got assaulted, you usually file a "criminal" complaint. I'm only concerned about this because I want to see him on the "Shaq Vs." show that I was talking about yesterday. It's not like I actually care about his well being or anything. And if he actually is guilty, I guess that's the reason why they call him "Big Ben".

China has blocked Google. Stop keeping the people down!


The charge against Harvard professor Henry Louis Gates Jr. was just dropped. In case you aren't aware of what happened, apparently this guy is a black professor at Harvard who returned home to Cambridge from a trip to China to find that the front door to his home was jammed. He went around back and opened the back door then had his driver help him force open the front door. Apparently, people thought this was suspicious so they called the cops on him. The cops show up to investigate a "break-in" and arrest the guy for disorderly conduct after he gets pissed off for being interrogated in his own home even after presenting the officers with ID. Naturally, he claims it was a result of racial bias, which it probably was. Then he gets hauled off to jail for FOUR hours before getting released. This is eerily similar to the movie "Amos & Andrew" starring Samuel L. Jackson and Nicholas Cage, which just so happens to be one of my favorite movies.

It's a slow day today. How about that rain? Shit sucks. Speaking of rain, check out this prank call from the Howard Stern show:



That's all I have for now. Adios.

Who let the dogs out???

I'm not sure all of you know, but Michael Vick was released from federal custody today after serving a 23 month sentence for beating and killing the shit out of dogs. If he gets reinstated by Commissioner Goodell, what are the odds that the Oakland Raiders sign him? 2-1? 3-1?



In other news, Tom Watson ruined his chance at being Golf's oldest major champion by duffing an 8 footer on 18 and then completely unraveling during the 4 hole playoff. It's okay Tom, at least there's always Viagra to lift you up.

If your erection lasts longer than 4 hours, please see a hooker.

Apparently, Shaq is now getting his own TV show. It's called "Shaq Vs." and he competes against other athletes in their own sports. This is awesome. He his going to get owned in every event but I'm sure it will make for good TV. I'm sure it'll be as entertaining as "The T.O. Show". Check out the T.O. Show trailer.

Let's hope the show is better than this movie.

As for my life, I have a wedding to attend this weekend and next weekend so be prepared for some pictures and hopefully some good stories.

Drama in work league soccer (continued)...

To have some sense of what is going on, please review the original post about the drama in work league soccer. Here is an updated email string as to new happenings in this wonderful league:

From: Navy Blue Team Captain
Sent: Wednesday, July 15, 2009 4:26 PM
To: Injured Player
Subject: Are you OK?

Injured Player,

Are you OK? You left early in the second half due to an injury. How bad does it feel today?

Navy Blue Team Captain

From: Injured Player
Sent: Wednesday, July 15, 2009 4:30 PM
To: Navy Blue Team Captain
Subject: RE: Are you OK?

Hey Navy Blue Team Captain,

Yeah, not doing that great. My knee swelled up really badly right after that. I iced it all night and it was still really bad in the morning, so I went to the hospital for x rays and met with an orthopedic doctor. He says he thinks it is either a torn ACL or torn cartiledge based on all the swelling. I have an MRI late tonight to determine if their is in fact a tear or not. Looks like I will be out for the rest of the season. Thank you for checking in.

From: Navy Blue Team Captain
Sent: Wednesday, July 15, 2009 4:38 PM
To: Rest of the Captains in the league
Subject: FW: Are you OK?

Guys:

One of our players got injured pretty badly yesterday. See email below (just refer to the string above). We’ll have to be careful about the level of contact to prevent such incident in future games.

Navy Blue Team Captain

From: Navy Blue Team Captain
Sent: Wednesday, July 15, 2009 5:02 PM
To: Rest of the Captains in the league
Subject: RE: Are you OK?

I got more details from the injured player. He confirmed it was an accident and the other player was not at fault as he did not commit any foul. Our player was just trying to avoid running into him, which the other guy admitted to me yesterday. We’ll have to be more careful and hopefully avoid such accident.

From: Royal Blue Team Captain #1
Sent: Thursday, July 16, 2009 8:45 AM
To: Rest of the Captains in the league
Subject: RE: Are you OK?

This is really something we should try to give more attention. Another issue is the language being used during the game. Between the few things that were said to me during last game

F…., M.. F…,C…S… the one that really made me mad was: Why don’t you learned English before you talk to me.

This should be a fun league and competitive to the minimum level.

Quick note: how many people immediately recognized that as being "Fuck, Motherfucker, Cock Sucker"? Moving on...

From: Royal Blue Team Captain #2
Sent: Thursday, July 16, 2009 9:19 AM
To: Rest of the Captains in the league
Subject: RE: Are you OK?

This type of language and behavior should not be tolerated. We should review and change the league constitution to confront these situations.

We should consider invite anyone that behaves this way to join a different league and that they are not welcome to play with us.

Royal Blue Team Captain #1,

I feel sorry for what happened to Injured Player. I believe that our game was played fairly and they were no intention from both teams to injury any players.

We even agree at the end of the game that best result should have been a tie.

-Royal Blue Team Captain #2

From: Royal Blue Team Captain #3
Sent: Thursday, July 16, 2009 9:45 AM
To: Rest of the Captains in the league
Subject: RE: Are you OK?

Hi All,

As we come into the final games of the season, please remind your teams of the league’s constitution. The captains agreed to this constitution prior to the start of the season and it is our responsibility to keep our teams within it.

Should you be faced with a situation where the play is getting “dangerous”, please keep in mind that the rules due contain a line about a captain’s agreement on a “sin bin”. Even if that means stopping the game for a time so that cooler heads can prevail.

Overall, I think teams are enjoying the experience with the league. Let’s keep that in focus as we finish the year and look forward to a 2^nd year in 2010.

All teams appear to have experienced the injury bug on Tuesday night. I hope all injured players are recovering and that none of the injuries are serious.

If you have any questions and/or additional concerns, please do not hesitate to contact myself or Royal Blue Team Captain #4. Good luck on the rest of the season!

Royal Blue Team Captain #3

Quick note: I'm assuming here that the "sin bin" is something like a penalty box in hockey.

From: Sissy
Sent: Thursday, July 16, 2009 11:04 AM
To: Rest of the Captains in the league

Subject: RE: Are you OK?

Hi,

I agree with Royal Blue Captain #2,

There is no reason to tolerate such a behavior/language in this league now and we cannot just hope things will not happen. At this point everyone knows the constitution.

It’s time to react and I recommend that our captains vote and invite this person(?) to leave this league immediately.

Sissy

Quick note: YES!!! Sissy is back!

From: Black Team Captain
Sent: Thursday, July 16, 2009 11:18 AM
To: Rest of the Captains in the league

Subject: RE: Are you OK?

I disagree with the notion to vote someone out of the league. To me, the consequences of the precedent that will set will spin out of control. We do not have a league commissioner to fine or suspend players and since we all have full time jobs outside of being (work league) soccer captains, I don’t think any of us should be put in the position to police the league in such a way.

I do, however, agree with Royal Blue Team Captain #3 that we should all remind our players of the constitution -- because how many of your team members have really read it? In addition to that, and more importantly, it is up to us to keep these games under control as they are occurring. Perhaps we could all put a little more effort into the refereeing of our games and utilizing the “sin bin” to re-teach our teammates that foul language and dirty play is not going to be tolerated in this soccer league. There is a lot we can do to fix this and kicking one individual out of the league will not solve this problem.

Black Team Captain

From: Sissy
Sent: Thursday, July 16, 2009 12:21 PM
To: Rest of the Captains in the league

Subject: RE: Are you OK?

>>I do, however, agree with John that we should all remind our players of the constitution -- because how many of your team members have really read it?

Pardon me but

Does it mean that adult and professional players in this league may not know that they should not swear and a language like “learn English first….”

has a racist tone?

Sissy

From: Royal Blue Team Captain #3
Sent: Thursday, July 16, 2009 1:32 PM
To: Rest of the Captains in the League

Subject: RE: Are you OK?

On behalf of Royal Blue's office, I apologize for the previous comment.

Let’s table this discussion and move forward. The teams involved have closed this matter.

For (hopefully) the final time, best of luck in the coming weeks.

Alright, so there you have it. Based on this email string, I'm really surprised why they call soccer such a girl sport (sarcasm alert!). The amount of bitching in this league is downright laughable, annoying, yet strangely entertaining all at the same time.

FML of the week: Today, I thought it was a good idea to go number two while smoking a "cigarette". My ash tray was over by the sink so I decided to just ash in the toilet. While ashing between my legs, I sneezed and now I have a extremely uncomfortable burn on my man member. Smoking is bad. FML

MLIA of the week: Yesterday, I set my clock 10 minutes ahead so I'd think it was later than it really was when I got up for work next morning, so I wouldn't be late. This morning, I woke up and I knew the clock was advanced. I was late for work. MLIA

Have a good weekend everybody!

This doesn't make sense

This was cool but not deserved.

Here is the list of ESPY award winners from last night. For the most part, I agree with the awards but there is one award that is just screaming stupidity: Best Team - Los Angeles Lakers

I'm not writing this post to bash our rival Lakers for winning this award. The Celtics won the same award last year. I'm writing because I think it's stupid to give this award to a basketball team. Basketball is one of the most individual-driven sports out there. Case in point: The Cavs have managed to make it deep in the playoffs because of one guy, LeBron James. The rest of the team sucks and everybody knows it. Same thing with the Lakers. They have Kobe and Gasol and a bunch of scrubs. In basketball, if you have one or two dominant players, you can surround them with a bunch of average to below average guys and they will still be a successful team. Even the '95-'96 Bulls who went 72-10 and won the NBA championship should not be considered the "Best Team" because it was all Jordan and Pippen. And baseball is just an individual sport masquerading as a team sport.

So who do I suggest should win this award? Easy. It should be a football team or a hockey team every year. Why? Because these sports actually center on the "team" aspect. In football, you have to have 11 guys in sync in order to succeed. The O-line has to protect the quarterback or open holes for the running game and the skill players need to execute. On defense, you need to have your coverages in order or you will get burned every time. In hockey, you have to have 4-5 good lines of players to carry you throughout the game. I can't think of any hockey team who has won the Stanley Cup with just one good line. In basketball, you can have one guy go coast-to-coast every time down the floor and dominate the game. Not a true team sport.

If anyone can give me a reason why a basketball team should ever win the ESPY for best team, please let me know, but it doesn't make sense to me.

This is getting old

Another MLB All Star Game, another American League win. What is this, 13 years in a row now? It's pretty silly how the American League just continues to dominate this event. For the last 6 years, the American League victory in the All Star Game has granted them with home field advantage in the World Series. However, it really hasn't been an advantage as both the National and American League teams have won 3 World Series titles apiece in that span. I would assume that after a longer sampling, the team with home field advantage would end up winning the majority of the World Series titles, but we won't know for sure until it happens.

The fact that it even determines home field advantage, to begin with, is stupid. It's an exhibition game that features over 90% of the players who won't be participating in the World Series anyway, so why let them have any influence on it? The best way of doing it is by giving home field advantage to the team with the best record. Pretty fuckin simple. That's how they do it in the NBA and the NHL (obviously not the NFL because the Super Bowl is held at a predetermined and most likely "neutral" field). But you have Bud Selig trying to save face after that horrible debacle in 2002 when the All Star Game ended in a tie when both managers ran out of players. This isn't the way to do it.

With the current system, we have managers managing the game like it's a real game, saving players and pitchers for certain situations and so on and so forth. This means that a bunch of players do not get to play. I say we play the 9 inning game, have the score count for nothing, but make it mandatory that all of the players are featured in the game. There's nothing worse for a fan base than having a guy they vigorously voted for sitting on the bench for the entire game. What's the point? We could get into the whole "fans shouldn't determine who's an All Star" debate, but that has been beaten to death so many times that it doesn't need to be addressed.

To be honest, if the All Star Game is going to continue to determine home field advantage, then I want the National League to win every year. That way, when the Red Sox sweep the World Series, we'll be able to celebrate at Fenway hahaha.

Dumb bitch falls down manhole while texting. Plans to file lawsuit.

Source: MSN.com

We all know that walking and texting is a tough combination -- but a Staten Island teen learned the hard way when she fell into an uncovered sewer manhole while trying to send a message.

Now, the family of Alexa Longueira, 15, intends to sue.

The girl suffered a fright and some scrapes on her arms back after she dropped into the hole on Victory Boulevard.

"It was four or five feet, it was very painful. I kind of crawled out and the DEP guys came running and helped me," Longueria told the Staten Island Advance.. "They were just, like, 'I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"

For its part, the Department of Environmental Protection said its workers had turned away briefly to grab some cones when the incident occurred.

"We regret that this happened and wish the young woman a speedy recovery," DEP spokeswoman Mercedes Padilla said in a statement. She added that crews were flushing a high-pressure sewer line at the time.

The girl was checked out at Staten Island University Hospital and released.

Sewer line workers are supposed to cut off pedestrian access to work sites or at least mark them with warning signs.

The family said they will file a lawsuit -- for what, though, is not immediately clear. Her mother, Kim Longueira, said it doesn't matter that her daughter was walking and texting, and also, the 'gross' factor that can't be ignored.

"Oh my God, it was putrid," she said. "One of her sneakers is still down there"

You gotta be pretty fuckin stupid to fall into a manhole for any reason whatsoever. The fact that this dumb bitch did it while texting is funny because she was probably sending a "I can't wait to suck your dick" message to her boyfriend and next thing you know she was down in the dumps, literally. What's even more funny is the fact that this family is planning on filing a lawsuit. What the hell are they gonna sue for? For not safeguarding their retarded child? I mean, she's gotta be retarded right?

I think that the state of New York should countersue the family because they raised a fuckin moron. Seriously, if you are that oblivious to your surroundings while walking down a street, you should not be allowed to go outside. It's a danger to everyone else who lives a regular life of NOT FALLING INTO MANHOLES. Even blind people can avoid those manholes. This is pathetic. I'm gonna sue this fuckin family for being so dumb that I wasted my time reading about their ridiculous life.

Who's the Bigger A-Hole? Version 2.0

Alright, well it looks like we have another set of candidates for a "Who's the Bigger A-Hole?" poll. As a quick refresher, you might want to read the Who's the Bigger A-Hole version 1.0 before reading this one. Like last time, I know both of these people and was given permission to use their emails for this blog. As a side note, please keep in mind that these two "A-Holes" have since patched up their differences but that really is beside the point. Do not let that affect your judgment at all. Let the games begin!

Background information: Person A and Person B are friends. They are by no means "best" friends nor do they really hang out with each other that often. However, both Person A and Person B are on the same email string together with a bunch of our high school friends. Person A got married a few months ago and Person B was not invited to the wedding (for reasons outlined in the email exchange below). Person A gets the impression that Person B is holding a grudge and calls him out after Person B's latest "snide" remark.

Unlike last time, I don't need to do commentary. I am just going to lay out the emails. Here is what ensued. Please keep in mind that every one of these emails is a Reply All to a group of 8 people...

Person A: Person B, while you're taking shots at me, how about you squeeze in another veiled whiny comment about the wedding. it's been a few days. or you could stop being such a baby. whatever works for you

Me: Someone please set up an octagon at (mutual friend's place) on Saturday night. I'd love to see the Person A vs. Person B match

Person B: no Person A, im gonna continue to be a baby.

Person A: yea that's what i figured.

A short time later...

Person B: I'm done making comments about Person A, I thought I was one of your friends, I was the only person you didn't invite besides (mutual friend), you couldnt of at least been like "sorry Person B I couldn't invite you".

Person A: i wasn't able to invite you, (mutual friend), (another mutual friend), some of my school buddies. only 1 person has been a bitch about it though, you. (Person A's wife's) dad gave us a headcount...you can't invite everybody. most people get that

Person B: sorry didnt realize it would have been too much for you to have been like sorry I couldnt invite you.

Person A: so in your opinion i should've went to every person that i know that didn't get invited to the wedding and gave them a personal apology? okay next time i get married i'll keep that in mind. since we're such good friends, how about next time you have a problem with me you talk to me about it instead of talking behind my back and making bitchy comments. that way the whole email chain doesn't have to listen to this again.

Person B: i believe my comment was about what time (mutual friend's) race worked work for you, not a wedding comment. but fair enough next time you get married i'll expect an apology when i'm not invited.

Person A: and next time you have a problem with me i'll expect you to say something instead of being a prick on email for 2 months

Person B: Ok i'll try my best but being a prick is what I'm good at

Person A: at least we agree on something today

Me: Wait, am I allowed to post this email chain in my blog?

Other email chain member: yes, yes and FUCK YES!! HAHAH

Me: Alright, I've made the decision to post this email chain on my blog next week. Look for it on Monday. As always, I will redact identifying information so Person A and Person B will be known as "Person A" and "Person B". Thanks for the material guys, you've been great.

By the way, I heard that there was a $50 entrance fee to get into (mutual friend's place) on Saturday and he's charging $5 per beer.

Person B: Your an advertisement whore chan

Me: Person B, you are no longer invited to my future wedding.

Later on...

Person A: sorry to ruin the mood for all you ladies, but Person B and i made up. there will be no Person B-Person A matchup...

Person B: More like we made out. Good make up sex.

Other email chain member: BOOOO we paid for blood!!!!!!!

Me: Person A/Person B,

Do I have permission from both of you to post the email exchange on my blog, provided that I redact all personal information?

To be honest, I'm gonna post it anyway, but I figured I'd be fair and ask for your express permission first.

Person A: fine but i don't want to be Person A. i want my name to be Max Power

Person B: Only if I can be referred to as the guy with the really big penis.

As you can see, while both of their requests did have some merit, I chose to keep it simple and consistent with the Person A and Person B nicknames.

Time to vote

So who's the bigger A-Hole here? Is it:

• Person A, for not inviting Person B to the wedding and not telling him why
  
  
• Person B, for being upset at the non-invite and making "veiled whiny" comments on the email chain?

As usual, please vote on the poll located on the top right of the page.

Fun Friday Features

Try saying THAT 10 times fast. Anyway, I was pretty happy with the material I could post this week. I wrote over 5,000 words and frankly, I'm pooped. But I still have some material. Here we go...

I hate this bitch

First and foremost, I went to the Red Sox game on Wednesday night with Frank, Hanh, and Jackie. It was a pretty good game as we ended up winning 5-4, Big Papi had a 3 run bomb, Wakefield pitched well again, and Papelbon had another shaky save. The only problem was that I didn't even care if we won or lost, I just wanted to get the hell outta there. Now why would I say such a thing? Well, the reason why is because this C U Next Tuesday ("CUNT" for all of you slow people) would not shut the fuck up.

This fuckin chick was clearly wasted and keep yelling and screaming over and over again with a deep, man-sounding voice every 5 seconds for the final 3 innings of the game. It was so loud and obnoxious that everyone in our section kept looking at her in disgust. I actually offered the lady sitting behind me 5 dollars to fight her. She was so oblivious to the fact that I (well everyone else too) was annoyed that I actually stood up and offered anyone in the stands 5 dollars to kill me or punch me in the face, preferably the ear drum. No one took the offer but they all clearly understood the predicament I was in.

Me and my favorite fan

And then she got into a shouting match with a girl wearing an Oakland A's "Huston Street" t-shirt. As this drunk bitch was yelling "scoreboard" to the A's fan, she stumbled into the row below, basically leaning onto a couple of 8 year old kids. It was almost as funny as seeing Doody plow into that chick in the elevator (see previous post). See, I hate these pink-hat-wearing, fair weather fans who don't know what the fuck they're talking about and try to rub it in the faces of opposing fans now that the Red Sox are an annual powerhouse. Selfishly, I was almost hoping that the A's would win (it's only one game, right?) so that she'd shut the fuck up and go away. Or better yet, kill herself. She definitely needs a big black cock permanently lodged down her throat from now on.

Email exchange of the week

(courtesy of dontevenreply.com)

From the creator of the site: This is a collection of e-mails I have sent to people who post classified ads. My goal is to mess with them, confuse them, and/or piss them off. These are the ones that succeeded.

This is just one of many solid email exchanges... Enjoy

Original ad:

I bought this GE refrigerator a few years ago, but just got a new one for my kitchen and no longer need it. It still works perfectly and is very large, perfect as your main fridge for a kitchen. I'm asking $300 for it. I am located in Brooklyn, but will be willing to deliver it up to 25 miles for a small fee.

Email Exchange:

From Mike Partlow to ************@**********.org

Hello,

I am very interested in your fridge. Is it still available? If so, how much would you charge to deliver it to my place in the city?

Mike

From marty ******* to Me

Yes mike it is still available. I will deliver it for an extra $50. where is your place located?

From Mike Partlow to marty *******

I want it delivered to my office on the 67th floor of the ********* Building on **rd st and **********. Now I am pretty sure that the fridge won't fit in the elevator, and if it does, it would exceed the weight capacity, so you will have to carry it up the stairs. I hope this won't be a problem.

When can you deliver it? I work Monday-Friday 9-5 and can be there any time. I do need it sooner rather than later, however.

Mike

From marty ******* to Me

that is absurd. Im not going to heave this very heavy fridge up 67 flights of stairs. Dosent your building have a cargo/utility elevator?

From Mike Partlow to marty *******

Marty, you don't have to lug it up 67 flights of stairs. There is a loading bay around back that starts on the 2nd floor, and I'm pretty sure this building does not count the 13th floor. So you are really only carrying it up 65 flights of stairs. There was a cargo elevator, but building management has told me that I am never allowed to use it again after I attempted to bring my motorcycle up to my office. They don't let just anyone use it anymore, so that isn't an option.

From marty ******* to Me

absolutely not. do you have any idea how heavy this thing is? why do you even need a full size fridge in your office? just buy one of those small mini fridges.

From Mike Partlow to marty *******

Marty,

You are obviously not a very good salesman if you are trying to suggest I buy something else instead of your product. How is that working out for you? Do you make a lot of money that way?

Not that it is any of your business, but I cannot afford rent in my apartment anymore and am slowly trying to move into my office so I can live out of there. I plan on disguising the fridge as a filing cabinet so my company will not get suspicious. If anyone asks you what you are doing when you are moving it into my office, just tell them that you are delivering my new filing cabinet. Try to tuck the power cord under the fridge so they don't realize that it is actually a fridge.

How does next Tuesday work? I am free all day.

Mike

From marty ******* to Me

mike I don't think you understood me. I am NOT delivering the fridge to your office. it's way too big and heavy, and I doubt you will find anyone willing to carry it up to the 67th floor.

From Mike Partlow to marty *******

Marty,

I'm sorry, I must have misread your ad. I could have sworn it said "will be willing to deliver it up to 25 miles for a small fee." Am I crazy, or did your ad say that?

I don't recall it saying "will be willing to deliver it as long as your building isn't too big and scary for my weak little body to carry it."

From marty ******* to Me

Hey listen asshole. You are a Fuckin idiot if you honestly think somebody will do this. It has nothing to do with strength it is just an insane request. the only way you will get a fucking fridge up there is with an elevator. fuck off.

From Mike Partlow to marty *******

Marty, I get what you are saying. It doesn't have anything to do with strength, because even my 120 lb ex-wife could carry this thing up. It is clearly a lack of motivation. You need to be in the right mindset to be able to do this.

Tell you what, I'll stand behind you as you carry it up, and shout encouraging motivational words at you to keep you going. I'll say things like "c'mon Marty, you can do it! You're almost there!" and "don't give up!" I'll even bring a few bottles of Gatorade in case you get thirsty. What flavor do you want? I have frost and orange, but I really don't recommend orange because it doesn't even taste like Gatorade.

So see you Tuesday?

Mike

From marty ******* to Me

shut the fuck up.

Classic stuff...

Weekend Plans

It looks like I'm going white water rafting on Saturday morning/afternoon, followed by UFC 100 at Big Pete's Saturday night. Sunday is all softball all the time, so hopefully I'll have something good to report on Monday.

Actually, I have a new Who's the Bigger A-Hole? coming next week so look out for that one. Have a nice weekend everybody!

4th of July weekend recap Part II

Here is the continuation from the previous post...

Quick disclaimer: All of the events portrayed did actually happen, but they happened from my perspective. I may have remembered some things incorrectly only because it's hard to recall things that happened when I was hammered. If so, please let me know and I can update the specifics. Also, in the context of this recap, I redacted some personal identifying information (some last names, some first names, etc.), where necessary, in an effort to make sure this blog isn't in the spotlight in case one of you ever becomes famous. Happy reading...

Saturday (7/4/09)

Woke up on the edge of the bed next to Frank, who was occupying about 90% of the bed. I think the only reason I woke up was because he was inching me closer and closer off the bed as the night progressed. For the record, there was no gay shit going on here. I put a pillow between us as a "barrier to entry" so to speak. Once we finally got out of bed, me, Frank and the ladies decided to grab breakfast at Denny's and then we came back, everyone showered up and got dressed for the wedding.

We stayed at the Hilton Garden Inn.

The wedding ceremony was held at 1pm at St. Joseph the Worker Church in Liverpool, NY. It was about a 15 minute ride from the hotel. We showed up about 10 minutes before the wedding procession started and immediately realized that it was pretty warm in the church that day. It was a very traditional Catholic wedding ceremony with the bride (Teresa) coming out to the Bridal Chorus by Wagner. There were also 2 readings, a responsorial psalm, a gospel, and a homily. All in all, it didn't seem all that long as they got through most of the ceremony in about 50 minutes.

Left to right: Maid of honor, Teresa, Jim, Best Man Bob

That was, until the Maid of Honor (the Bride's sister) ended up fainting by the altar which caused a 15 minute delay as they tended to her. The best part about it was that Dr. Doody "saved the day" by waiting about 10 minutes before he decided to help out. To be fair, he's not a real doctor yet, but when he does become one, I hope to God I'm not one of his patients. This was followed by the priest resuming the ceremony by saying "I really mean it when I say let us pray". It was an unfortunate time to faint though because it literally happened right before the final blessing. Well, at the very least, no one is going to forget this wedding. We originally thought that the fainting was as a result of simply the lack of air conditioning in the Church, but we then decided that it had to be a combination of the heat and the hangover that the Maid of Honor was probably nursing from the night before. We cannot confirm that though since she was not part of the Friday night debacle. The following video is meant to give you an idea of what may have occurred and not to be considered in poor taste of the travesty that happened at this wedding. Okay, you gotta admit, it was pretty funny. You can laugh.



After the wedding, everyone headed out to the parking lot to talk and mill about. The newlyweds and their families had photo obligations so while we waited for them to finish, a whiffle ball session broke out. Once that ended, we headed over to the Bride's parent's place for a light lunch and then back to the hotel to take naps until the 6pm reception. FYI, I did not drop a deuce at Teresa's parent's place because they only had one bathroom on the first floor and it was right near all of the food. I didn't want to contaminate the spread. So I held out until we got back to the hotel and unleashed hell.

Whiffleball is fun.

I woke everyone up shortly before 5:30 and we headed down to the lobby as there was a bus waiting for us to shuttle us to the reception. This was a nice touch by Jim & Teresa (the newlyweds) as it was July 4th, everyone was going to be drinking, and the cops were going to be out in full force. Smart thinking. Someone definitely would've gotten a DUI.

The reception was held at Lafayette Hills Golf and Country Club in Jamesville, NY which happened to also be about 15 minutes from our hotel. Basically, everything was 15 minutes from the hotel. Beautiful country club, nice scenic views, and most importantly, an open bar. We got some drinks, made small talk with some people, then took some pictures. Before dinner began, I decided to set a goal of drinking every type of alcohol available. I think I succeeded. I ended up having a Jack & Coke (whiskey), a Capecodder (vodka), a Gin & Tonic (gin), a Rum & Coke (rum), a scotch on the rocks (scotch), a glass of red wine, a glass of white wine, champagne, 2 beers, a Manhattan (liquer) and a tequila sunrise (tequila). And for some reason, after all of that, I wasn't even wasted. I was drunk, but not smashed.

Most of the people in this picture took part in Friday's debacle.

Before dinner began, they did all of the formal introductions, the first dance, and the speeches from the Best Man and the Maid of Honor/Her twin brother. I don't remember much of the Maid of Honor speech but I remember that the Best Man (Jim's brother Bob) did take it easy on Jim and actually called out all of his friends at Table 17 (a bunch of the fantasy baseball guys and other friends) as the guys who could dish out the dirt on Jim. I was actually hoping that he'd say a story about walking in on Jim beating off or something ridiculous like that, but I guess not. Bob did make it a point to advise all of the single ladies in the room to "stay away from the guy they call Doody", which was hilarious because that's his real last name but everyone probably thought he was making a joke about bowel movements. In a way, he probably was. I'm not particularly sure if that helped Doody's game or hurt it, but I do have to say that it's pretty cool being included in a Best Man's speech. That is, unless Bob said something like "Doody has AIDS". So we all raised our glasses, cheered to the new couple and dinner commenced.

For me, dinner was good. I had the prime rib which was cooked to my liking: medium rare. My table was one of the first tables to be served so it was piping hot when it arrived. Unfortunately for Frank, his table was the last to be served so by the time he got his food, it was overcooked (from being on the warmers too long) and it actually was cooler than room temperature. Oh well, sucks for them haha. By the way, I took a shit at the country club in case you were wondering.

Side note: We were trying to figure out how old these two cute waitresses were at the reception and everyone kept saying that they had to be over 18 years old and, therefore, would have sex with them. I held steady in saying that they looked much younger and were barely 18 at the oldest. I think Dodson came in with a guess of age 22. Well, Doug's gf Kim decided to ask one of them and guess what? They were 16 years old. So for all of you assholes who thought they were of age and wanted to bang them... (please insert statutory rape joke here).

After we finished eating, the band got everybody moving by playing some nice tunes. I think Marotta was the one who rallied the troops as we invaded the dance floor. Filipino Mike decided to get things jumpin by doing some breakdancing and some other smooth moves which really impressed the old white folk. Everyone else sprung into action and carved up the dance floor. There were even confirmed reports that "Last Place Doug" was caught dancing when Poker Face was played. I didn't see it happen but I'm pretty sure it was a disaster. When the music slowed down, the slow dancing started and that's when Don Magic Juan Kristian B. decided to spring to action (for comedic purposes, we'll call him "Chen Who?"). Our man from Boston had been working his game with this Emily chick all afternoon at the wedding and all during the cocktail hour and dinner. It was only right they they slow danced. And once they did, it was sealed.

We haven't heard the full story yet, but all inclinations point to this boy turning into a MAN that evening. For context purposes, Emily was Teresa's friend from Boston who "needed a ride" to Syracuse because she didn't want to drive alone. Kristian is an admitted "asian fetish" predator who was described as a "ladies man" by Teresa. Naturally, Kristian had no problem offering to provide her with transportation. When Sonya asked Emily later on that evening what she looks for in a guy, she responded with "tall white guy, blond, 6 feet 4 inches". Hey guess what, Kristian is a tall white guy with blond hair and he's 6 feet 4 inches tall. What a coincidence! I did not make this up.

Frank, AKA "Rodz", and his gf Hanh

Once the reception ended, we all piled back onto the shuttle bus and headed back to the hotel. Teresa's cousins and some other girls decided to come back and drink with us, so we popped open a couple bottles of wine and champagne and chilled outside. A few of the guys were working their game and there were some accounts of a little piece here and there. Kevin made out with Teresa's cousin and was then promptly cockblocked by her friends. Eric told me that Kevin referred to the cockblockers as the "Matrix Twins". I see the resemblance now that I think about it. Me, being the pimp that I am, ended up in bed with Frank again since the girls slept together for the second night in a row. We are such a cute couple.

Quick note: Doody was absolutely destroyed at the wedding. I couldn't seemlessly fit his drunkeness into each paragraph so I'm dedicating this area for that purpose. I recall him breaking at least a few glasses on the dance floor. He was to the point where you weren't sure if he was just going to pass out at any moment. Every time he dropped his drink, people advised him to drink some water and he'd break free and head to the bar for another drink. And just when you thought it couldn't get any worse, when we were back at the hotel, we got into the elevator and Doody was so wobbly legged that he fell backwards and sandwiched the girl who was standing behind him into the elevator wall. High comedy. There are also unconfirmed reports that beer was purchased from the lobby and charged to Doody's account.

Here is our google chat conversation from yesterday (after Doody read part I):

10:49 AM rmdoody: i'm scared for part 2

10:51 AM me: hahaha

10:52 AM i didn't destroy u in it <----- I guess I lied hahahaha

10:53 AM rmdoody: i did a good enough job of destroying myself

10:54 AM me: that u did haha

10:56 AM rmdoody: i'm kind of upset that i missed the strip club trip, but it might have been a good thing

i might have been stripping next to kevin or dead in the hotel by sunday morning from alcohol poisoning

10:57 AM me: yeah if u were as drunk as u were saturday night, at the strip club on friday, we all would've been arrested

10:59 AM rmdoody: no shit...i was a disaster at the wedding

i'm just glad i'm still alive

11:02 AM me: i heard that a few people saw u on your way out sunday morning

they all said you looked like you were going to die

hahaha

rmdoody: a little piece in me did die

11:03 AM there's nothing like taking a 7 hour drive while hungover

11:04 AM me: how was the drive? did you have any mishaps?

11:05 AM rmdoody: i made some stops along the way which helped...my brother near cooperstown and a college friend in albany

11:07 AM me: any puking?

11:08 AM rmdoody: nope...i don't think i puked at all

at least i don't remember puking

then again i was looking at pictures on FB and i didn't recall being in them at all

11:10 AM me: i remember u broke about 3 glasses during your drunken escapades

rmdoody: i kind of remember 1

11:12 AM me: haha

rmdoody: i wish that i drank a little less because i might have been a lot less of an ass as the night went on

me: u were a complete mess

it was fantastic

rmdoody: but i think that its one of the reasons that i'm invited to these things.

11:13 AM table 17 was a disaster to start with and then i was the damn ringmaster of the circus

11:16 AM me: u get that drunk on a regular basis?

if so, that is awesome

11:17 AM rmdoody: i try not to...but it happens at least a half dozen times a year, especially after med school exams

11:18 AM me: make sure you give me a call next time you finish a med school exam

11:19 AM rmdoody: lol

i can't wait for the next wedding

Sunday (7/5/09)

I woke up Sunday and had a pretty hard time getting out of bed. It's probably because I drank every fucking type of alcohol and my body was refusing to function. So all I did was lay there at the hotel and watch the Wimbledon finals until close to noontime. I finally mustered the strength to shower and pack, and then we headed back over to Teresa's parent's place for the day-after-brunch. There was tons of good food there (potato salad, macaroni salad, sandwiches, chips, etc.) but my stomach was basically turning over the whole time. I ran into a couple of Teresa's cousins who may or may not have had relations with some of the guys the night before (one of them did) and I just giggled to myself.

After hanging out for a couple of hours, we had to leave to drive Sonya to the airport, then we headed for home. On the way home, we stopped off in Lee, MA to grab some dinner and check out the outlets. We picked up a few items, then continued on our way back to Boston. I got home at around 9PM, showered, did some laundry and then passed out, ending a great weekend.

Interesting observations:

• All of the guys in our fantasy baseball league call Frank by his team name (Rodz) instead of his real name. I've never seen this happen before. At one point, I think Kevin even asked me what Frank's real name was. Just think about this. That's like calling people by their AIM screen name or something. Completely ridiculous, yet completely funny. Here is a pic of the fantasy baseball crew.

• A bunch of the older women at the Sunday brunch thought that I was Filipino Mike and commented on my unbelievable dancing ability. I guess all Asians DO look alike!

Shout Outs:

• Jim & Teresa - Congratulations on your new life together! May you enjoy your honeymoon and all of your POST marital sex
  
  
• Frank, Hanh, and Sonya - my roommates, thanks for another enjoyable weekend and for not calling the police after I farted and almost gassed everyone to death
  
  
• Doug, Kim, Jane, Ike, Kristian, and Dodson - good times at table 14!
  
  
• Secor brothers and Kyle - Eric, thanks for the ride up to 'Cuse. You are a funny dude. Tell Avril Lavigne I said hello. Kevin, you are one out of control motherfucka when you are drunk. Tell Lola I said hello. Kyle, stop having threesomes with dogs.
  
  
• Table 17 - I'm expecting you to post some of those incriminating stories about Jim in the comment section of this blog entry. You guys are cool dudes. Let's make sure we meet up more often instead of just once a year.
  
  
• Homeless Black Guy - keep playing that guitar my friend. you are a true legend
  
  
• 7 Year Old Freestyler and Backflip Kid - don't quit your day jobs
  
  
• People of Syracuse - learn how to have some fun
  

Left to right: Jim, Teresa, Kristian, Me, "Rodz"

Who's getting married next? Let's do it big again.